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Saturday Night Genealogy Fun -- What Memories Do You Have of Family Sickness or Deaths?

Calling all Genea-Musings Fans:

It's Saturday Night again -

time for some more Genealogy Fun!!


Here is our assignment from Randy Seaver of Genea-Musings:

1)  What memories do you have of family sickness or death?  Tell us about one or more of them and how the family dealt with it.


Here’s mine:

Grandfather, Tom J. Johnston
The first death that I was aware of was my grandfather, Tom J Johnston’s in 1973. I remember my mother getting a call from my grandmother and my parents going over to the house. I was left to watch over my five younger brothers and sisters. I was between freshman and sophomore in college.

I somehow remember that we were cleaning up the yard for company we were going to have that weekend, but that was all canceled. The funeral was on Friday at the Oak Park Hills Chapel. My two youngest sisters did not attend and perhaps Mrs. Potter watched them. We were told it would be a closed casket, but when we got there, it was open. That was the first person I ever saw who was dead. Actually, he looked okay. Normally he was a bit gruff and grumpy around us, but look peaceful and calm.

From the service we rode in limousines to the Oakmont Memorial Park. I was sitting on a jump seat. I don’t remember much about the services. This was before the genealogy bug got me. I probably cried, but I do that easily at sad things.

After the graveside services everyone went back to my grandmother’s house, where there was lots of food. I saw my mom’s cousins, who we hardly ever saw. My dad’s aunts came, and Aunt June brought a lemon meringue pie – it was the best I ever tasted!


Grandmother, Anna M. (Sullivan) Hork
We got the word that our Nana died on 14 February 1979. We were all at the house, where my parents were hosting a valentine’s day party. Dad was called to the phone and when he got off, he told us the news. She had been living in a rest home for several years and was in declining health.

The funeral was held at her church, St. Matthew’s in San Mateo. There was no cemetery gathering as her body was shipped to Los Angeles so she was buried next to my grandfather, William C Hork at the Los Angeles National Cemetery. They hadn’t lived together since before 1940, but since they were never divorced, she could be buried there for free.

After the funeral mass at the church, my aunt and uncle, Virginia and Johnny Gertridge, hosted the gathering, which was basically an Irish wake--lots of laughter, story-telling, and booze.

Grandmother, Pansy Louise (Lancaster) Johnston
My grandmother, Mam-ma, lived to one month short of 100 years. At the end, her kidneys gave out and hospice was called to see to the final days. She was living in an assisted care facility and we visited often. Once hospice was there, we took turns staying with her. She was in pain and then kind of out of it from the morphine. It was hard watching her die. There was no storytelling; she was silent. I can’t remember the details of the days—my sisters probably have better memories of it. It wasn’t pleasant and we had difficulty with the nurses, but it was a relief at the end. The funeral director was so nice to us. We had the memorial at the funeral home and then caravanned to the cemetery where she was buried next to our grandfather, Tom.

At the cemetery, my sister had checked out the site and discovered a tree had grown where our grandmother was to be buried. So they had to dig out my grandfather, make the hole deeper, and then return him so my grandmother could be put on top. I’m sure they were gritting their teeth. My grandparents paid about $800 for the gravesite plots back in the mid-60s, that today would be ten times that amount.

We had the gathering at Zio Fredo’s restaurant, which is just down the street from the cemetery. They put out a nice buffet spread and we were pleased by the people who joined us. I really appreciate my sister who took care of all of the arrangements.

Someday, I’ll write about my parents’ and husband’s parents’ deaths.

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Copyright © 2021 by Lisa S. Gorrell, My Trails into the Past. All Rights Reserved.

Comments

  1. Your family appears to have been much more involved and communicative than mine. I think that's a good thing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Your memories are much more family affairs. My family was so small that funerals were much more sedate.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that is easier when one has a large family and everyone still lived close by.

      Delete

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